Thank you to everyone who shared their awkward sex stories #onthecouchwithcarly over the past few weeks. It has been a very entertaining process for me as you can imagine. I thoroughly enjoyed the ones high in comedic value the most.

If you haven’t already, check out the entries in the comments section here.

Sex stories are fun and funny but reading through yours also reminded me that sex is really not how it is portrayed in porn or even in PG 13 movies. And thank goodness for that. In these stories I can feel your human vulnerability. Of course we are vulnerable when we risk exposing ourselves in the act of sex. Having desire makes us vulnerable and making mistakes too.

We really do use this word “awkward” a lot these days. I think we are awkward when we’re afraid, when we don’t know how to feel, or when we feel inadequate. I think it is fair to say that by this definition, sex and awkwardness goes hand-in-hand.

Let’s be kinder to ourselves and maybe even enjoy the awkwardness of life this week. If we can get over awkward sexual encounters and smile and laugh about them even, then we can learn to love ourselves with all our human vulnerability.

So now the big moment you’ve all been waiting for. Here is your winning post by Jenna Tal Wortz:

Carly I want to win a big fat effing dildo from you!!!

My story (obvs my name is – Jena Tal Wortz):
I was once went home with a honey who fingered me with skanky long fingernails on an IKEA bed. Said bed collapsed under the weight of our foreplay and his nail sliced open my sad little labia. luckily, said dude was also pre-med and a part-time carpenter. So after patching me up, throwing away the blood soaked sheets, and bicarbing the mattress, we spent the rest of that date fixing what turned out to be his brother’s bed in his brother’s home.

I never heard from him again.

DILDO PLEASE

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Special shout out to Carvaka Sex Toys for supplying the prize :)