The responses to this question reflect two very serious sexual issues that probably 90% of people have experienced.
1) Unwanted/forced/coerced sexual intercourse
This can be for many reasons but it would seem that both male and female respondents are somewhat scarred from incidents in which they were expected to put out or felt they should when they really didn’t want to. Without going into it too much, there is still a huge need for us to talk about these things, especially as there very real dangers involved. Please be careful out there and know that no one deserves access to your body unless you feel 100% safe and comfortable.
“The fact that it was, in an implicit way, “mandatory” for the sake of having that person’s interest and attention” (Female respondent)
“Having sex with someone when I didn’t want to (with my consent ) because I felt guilty for not doing the act” (Female respondent)
“I realised during sex that the guy really wasn’t interested in me, he was only interested in sex and getting what he wanted from it” (Female respondent)
“Feeling pressurized to perform but not enjoying the sex yet not knowing how to say no. And then I lost my erection and it was just awkward” (Male respondent)
2) Erectile dysfunction
Unfortunately I think this is become more not less of a problem in our modern world. The thing is, our minds and bodies are not separate. Most erectile dysfunction has a psychological basis. Stress, pressure, unwanted or intrusive thoughts – these are usually the culprits. And let’s face it – our lives are extremely stressful, there is less and less time for relaxation and leisure so therefore less time for sexercise! Performing on command and after a busy day when work-related intrusive thoughts keep busting in while you’re getting down – not exactly conducive for setting the mood. So what do we do? We have a whiskey or three…and that also doesn’t help the situation now does it. This is a very serious issue and one that each couple needs to think about carefully and sensitively. But for goodness sake, please be kind with yourselves and your partner
“Couldn’t get it up with a really hot girl. That was the end of it :(” – Male respondent
“A number of sexual opportunities have arisen (at least 4 significant ones) and in the heat of the moment my body let me down and I couldn’t get an erection.” – Male respondent
“With a guy who had a small, limp dick. Felt so frustrated.” – Female
Some more responses to Q5: Describe your worst sexual experience?
“A one nighter that turned out to be 2 minutes of fun, for him and only him!” – Female respondent
“After breaking up with girlfriend I would still see her sometimes. Once I stayed over the night but told her I wasn’t prepared to sleep in her bed so she jerked me off and then expected me to finger her and we both felt incredibly shitty afterwards, like we had just used and been used.” – Male respondent
“Him jumping me like a drunken rabid dog and then complaining about “aah baby, why you not wet for me huh?” dumbass.” – Female respondent
There were also some less savoury responses… but I guess that is what you get with an anonymous sex survey hey…
“The woman did not shut up for a moment… talking about all sorts of things… and constant asking if this position was ok, or should she change etc.. I eventually kicked her out of the bed… I couldn’t take the incessant noise… that was a close 2nd to someone who clearly hadn’t showered or bathed and her vagina smelled awful… I offered to shower with her but she wouldn’t… and I wouldn’t go down on her, let alone any penetration.” – Male respondent
“Making out with an ugly fat girl when I was much younger in the same room as my best friend who was making out with the girl I was in love with” – Male respondent
“Unattractive girl at bar who begged me to take her home and fuck her which I then did, half enjoyed myself and then regretted with every part of my body the next morning when I had to drive her home and look at her face without being drunk.” – Male respondent